New Beginnings

October 30 is an important day in my life.  It was 14 years ago today that my Dad died, and it was one year ago today that I walked out of the office and said goodbye to my job at Washington Mutual after 10 years.  On this one day I allow myself to wallow in sadness remembering loved ones and dear friends who I miss so much.

But with each ending has come a new beginning.  An essential part of every hero’s journey is the loss of a mentor, someone who provided guidance and made the hero feel safe.  For Harry Potter it was Dumbledore, and for Luke Skywalker it was the loss of Obi Wan.  Karen Blixen (aka Isak Dinesen) lost just about everything in Africa – her health, her money, the love of her life.  She then moved back to her family in Denmark and became one of literature’s most beloved writers.

Loss is a sad but essential step on anyone’s journey, and it doesn’t have to be a death to qualify as a loss.  But through loss the hero is forced to tap into all they’ve learned, to stand on their own and come into their true potential.  Grieving is important, but even more important is how you create a new beginning from your loss.  What will you chose? 

One experience I’ve chosen many times in my career is going to work for a new company taking a job that at a lower level job than what I had left.  When I got laid off as International Product Development Manager at First Interstate Bank in 1991 I moved back to Seattle, played around with running a dress shop, worked for a year as a contractor in a bank that got bought, then got a job with a software company as a temp secretary.  Getting any job in a new industry was interesting and challenging for me.  Also, my self-confidence was not high, so I didn’t think I’d qualify for anything more senior.  After a year I moved up the ranks to project manager, and then after couple of years I got re-org’d to managing product localization, which was an orphan function in a company that wanted to grow international revenues.  I did that job so well that management decided to make localization an integral part of the software development process, and the need for a separate department was gone as was my job.  So I got a job with one of the localization vendors as a sales person.  I had never done sales before so I was back to square one. I sucked at sales! But I applaud myself for being willing to go back to being a beginner – like when I took up ballroom dancing at the age of 39.  I love that about me!

Now, after leaving the corporate environment I’m a beginner again.  Learning to work for myself without an existing structure of goals and processes (and financing) has been a challenge, but I’m learning loads every day from my clients and my experiences.

If you find yourself reeling from a loss and therefore on the threshold of a new beginning (even if you can’t see it yet), you have an exciting, enlightening, and kinda scary time ahead.  Here are two things to keep in mind:

• Give yourself credit for capabilities and knowledge you’ve accumulated that can be put to use in any situation. Try to ‘unbrand’ your experience.  You may have a background in one industry or one type of situation, but think of your experience in generic terms.  In fact, don’t limit your experience gained on the job just to other job situations.  Think of your life as a whole.
• Develop a ‘beginner’s mind.’  If you’re feeling insecure about being a newbie, rather than trying to fake it, have an attitude of openness, eagerness, and lack of preconceptions.  You'll learn faster.  One famous saying is:  In the beginner's mind there are many possibilities, in the expert's mind there are few.   

Hiring a coach is a great way to get support, new perspectives, and an accountability buddy.  I know you can do it, and I’d love to partner with you on this stage of your journey – I’ve been there.